Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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