my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
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