OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
