Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
