Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
