Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Randomize