sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
