Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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