i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I want to make a zoo with you.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
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