Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
