Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
