I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize