He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
