i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Randomize
