im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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