Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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