An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize