Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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