Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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