That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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