I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Randomize
