My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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