Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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