I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize