i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
