We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
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