Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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