dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Randomize
