I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize