By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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