some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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