all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
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Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
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No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?