Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I can feel your judgement through the phone