So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.