don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
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