i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
