Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
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I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
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Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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