Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
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He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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