4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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