woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in