I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
21 Horny People Confess Their Boldest Sexual Advances
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
29 Shocking Confessions That People Thought Were A Joke
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.