yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Randomize
