Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
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