so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Randomize
