i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
