I don't remember. Are we still dating?
do herpes really smell.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
