by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize