How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
