I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
