I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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