i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
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OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
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