he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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