Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize