Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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